ramiro's blog

First Spanish Book on ACT applied to Education



"Accion tutorial y orientación: Aceptación, compromiso, valores". The English title might be something like: "Teaching and Advising at Secondary School: Acceptance, Commitment, Values".

I have just received the book from the Publishing house. My new book, the "last" one.

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Every day the same routine: A very early start only to find the everyday sullen colleagues in the rickety van towards the site where they will get the pile of advertisements which everyone in their corner would have to deliver to the hurried pedestrians who would pass by pretending not seeing him in order to avoid the inconvenience of having their hands hindered with the annoying handouts until they reach the nearest dustbin.


Dear Santa: this is just to say
That I don´t like the doll you left.
She is cross-eyed, her hair a mess
It seems to me sort of rags her dress.

I see my friend’s dolls so pretty, so well,
That I feel jealousy of their happiness.
Please Santa, come back and take it away!

Dear Santa, I hugged my doll yesterday
I told her some tales and we sang as well.
We shared our secrets and then fell asleep.


En cierta ocasión, un forastero llegó a la capital de un remoto lugar. Había viajado largo tiempo en busca del tesoro que, según la leyenda, se encontraba oculto en algún lugar de aquellas montañas. Como no sabía por dónde empezar, se dirigió a un mercader con aspecto honrado con el fin de conseguir alguna información sobre la posible ubicación del tesoro.


Once upon a time there was... a traveler who arrived at the main city in a distant country. He had taken a long journey in order to find the treasure which, according an old legend, was supposed to be buried in some hidden place in the mountains.


Who am I?
D’ you know it? Shall I know it some day?
I am my own way,
the waiting room of the being
That is waiting for me.
Today I’ve been a coward, a genius yesterday
And a stupid some other day;
I am an exhausted walker,
A deserted way,
A passing cloud
A gentle rain
A sour tear
A lonely wind
An extinguished fire.
And who knows what
I’ll be tomorrow.
And what about you,
Do you know who are you?
How many “you” are in you?
And who are all those people around…?
Do you know what “to be” means?
Tell it to me, please
I am yearning to know it.

TWO WORKDAYS (English version)

After the salute to the sun, the Monk lighted the incense bar, sat down in the lotus position and shut down his eyelids in searching of the inner emptyness that brings the power of the subtle cosmical energy. He inhaled... one, two, three, four... and exhaled the air out of his lungs, while trying to become one with the Absolute.

DOS JORNADAS (Spanish version)


Tras el saludo al sol, el gurú prendió la barra de incienso, adoptó la postura del loto y entrecerró los párpados. Buscó el vacío de su mente para, así, llenarse con el poder de las energías sutiles del cosmos. Inspiró…un, dos, tres, cuatro, y espiró el aire de sus pulmones; inspiró… un, dos, tres, cuatro… y espiró procurando disolver el contenido de su pensamiento para llegar a hacerse uno con el todo absoluto.

The Best Toy in the World (English Version)

TE BEST TOY IN THE WORLD (A Tale for a Christmas in Crisis)

He didn’t remember the toy-shop to be there. Perhaps it was a temporary shop with charitable aims for Christmas. Maybe they have used toys; that would be good for he could’nt afford to spend much money. He was looking for some cheap toy, a very cheap toy. Perhaps the shop-assistent could help him.



No recordaba que hubiera allí antes una juguetería. Seguramente era una de esas tiendas ocasionales que ponía alguna organización benéfica para recaudar fondos con la venta de juguetes. A lo mejor hasta tenían juguetes usados; eso estaría muy bien porque él no podía gastarse mucho dinero. No tenía ni idea de qué podía comprar. Tendría que ser algo barato, muy barato. A ver si el dependiente le echaba una mano.

LOS ZAPATOS NUEVOS (Spanish version)

Relucían como soles en sus pies y, lo que era mejor todavía, le resultaban cómodos como guantes. Fue girándose ante el espejo para ver el efecto desde todos los ángulos posibles: Perfecto. La caída del pantalón recubriendo parte del talón hacía destacar más aún el brillo de los zapatos que, por otra parte, hacía juego con el resplandor de su pelo engominado de domingo.

THE NEW SHOES (English version)

They were shinning at his feet and, even best, he could feel them as confortable as gloves. He turned himself in front of the full-length mirror to see them from every possible perspective. Perfect! The shinnig of the shoes matched to the shinning of his combed hair.

THE VISION (English version)

It was time to make a decision and he wanted to make the right one, so he had got ready everything carefully. He sat in the lotus position, in the most orthodox way, took a deep inhalation and tried to get the emptiness in his mind for he wanted to be ready for any intuition, ready for any light showing him the exit for the labyrinth of his life.

- I am open to the will of “my god” –he said as a mantra- I am ready to face my life according to my god’s will...

THE VISION (English version)

It was time to make a decision and he wanted to make the right one, so he had got ready everything carefully. He sat in the lotus position, in the most orthodox way, took a deep inhalation and tried to get the emptiness in his mind for he wanted to be ready for any intuition, ready for any light showing him the exit for the labyrinth of his life.

- I am open to the will of “my god” –he said as a mantra- I am ready to face my life according to my god’s will...

LA VISIÓN (Spanish version)

Era una decisión crucial y no quería equivocarse por eso había preparado todos los elementos con tanto cuidado. Entrecruzó las piernas y se sentó sobre los talones en la postura más ortodoxa de meditación. Inspiró con suavidad y, mientras exhalaba el aire, procuró hacer el vacío en su mente. Quería mantenerse abierto a cualquier intuición, a la luz que pudiera mostrarle con claridad la salida de su encrucijada vital.

- Me abro a la voluntad de mi dios –empezó a repetir como un mantra-. Quiero orientar mi vida según la voluntad de mi dios.

EL VENENO DE UNA ROSA: Sobre el agradecimiento - Spanish version


A ROSE'S POISON: About the value of gratitude

Celebrity Junior felt the forgotten rose on his lapel jacket. An stupid thing of his housekeeper. He pulled out the flower and a sting pricked his finger. C. Junior sucked the little drop of blood and felt the scent of the flower, so he decided to keep the rose instead of throwing it away and he asked himself about the meaning of the old houskeeper’s ritual who every morning, on the breakfast tray, put a flower that afterwards she attached to his lapel jacket. An eccentricity of the old woman....

Si dejara de llover...(if the rain stopped...)

ACT: "Reflexiones". 10 Core points (for me)

Some of my thoughts about ACT. A little guide for my and my clients (in Sapnish, English and French)


Con mis mejores deseos para todos.

Best wishes for everybody.

Meilleurs voeux à tous.

Mit den besten Wünschen.

Os meus melhores desjos a tudo mundo.

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Spanish version (see below english version)

ACEPTACIÓN, COMPROMISO: unidos como luz y sombra. Comprometerse con la propia vida es aceptar lo que la vida es. Aceptar las condiciones vitales que nos han tocado “en suerte” es comprometerse con la construcción del propio destino.

Porque me COMPROMETO con el CAMINO de mi vida,
ACEPTO las fatigas que produce el caminar
ya que quiero asegurarme de que mi itinerario vale la pena.

Porque me COMPROMETO a AMAR a quienes amo
ACEPTO las frustraciones que, a veces, enturbian el amor
ya que quiero fraguar un amor a prueba de desencantos.

rereadings, thoughts and self talk

A blog, my blog, I own a blog!

And I had forgotten it; so many weeks without an entry -the hot long summer and the works for the new feature of the site- But I would say something about my summer rereadings.

The first book I would like to refer to is "the Picture of Dorian Gray" by Oscar Wilde, an old novel from the days of my youth that I took in order to refresh my English and, can you believe it? I found some fresh concepts about Acceptance and Commitment, perhaps from the Wilde´s quite hedonistic point of view, but full engaged with taking the life as it comes: with its pleasures and its fears, its worries, hopes and sufferances and as Wilde says by the Dorian Gray´s voice, we well do our best by taking everything as it comes, without avoidance.

my way / mi camino

March, 13, 2006

ENGLISH VERSION (sorry for my awful English)

When I started my studies in Psychology, I was a "freudian": the unconsciousness, the superego... all that seemed a fascinating world to me. But I ended my studies as a behaviorist and I didn´t want to know anything more about psychoanalisis.

Then, I started my consultation and I felt dissapointed with the cold behaviorist tools, so, I began moving towards Humanism. I "discovered" Carl Rogers and Carkhuff and I became a "fan" of their works.

Then, I met Albert Ellis in his books and in a course he did in Madrid; so, I turned up an rational-emotif therapist and, of course, an explorer of the mental world: its contents and processes.
And that curiosity about mental contents took me to learn about General Semantics and from that theory by Alfred Korzybski I understood better some subjets on constructivism as "personal constructs" theory, by G. Kelly and the basis of narrative therapy.

And so, I arrived to Palo Alto, where I met Paul Watzlawick and Richard Fish and so on, and the reason for their motto: "let´s be brief" and the fundamentals on the strategic therapy. I was glad with a so fascinating perspective.

Finally, I declared myself as an "eclectic-integrationist"

But something inside me was out of order. I had the impression that Psychology had moved towards a medical point of view instead of a psychological one and I was very unconfortable with that feeling.

Finally, through a quite easy book ("La mente o la vida" by J. Barraca; ed. DDB, Bilbao, Spain) I met ACT theory and I got very pleased with the "discovery". So, I devoured the whole bibliography avoidable in Spanish: Carmen Luciano Soriano and, then, the books by Hayes (I am learning English in order to read all of them).

Now, I don´t mind what kind of psychologist I am: I am a humanist-behaviorist one, interested on the plot of life and in being in the way along with anybody who comes to me...

Cuando me asomé a los estudios de psicología, yo era un freudiano convencido: el subconsciente, el superyó, el dinamismo de los impulsos; todo eso me parecía un mundo fascinante. Pero terminé los estudios convertido en un conductista acérrimo; no quería ni oir hablar de psicoanálisis o cosa semejante.

Cuando comencé mi práctica profesional, desencantado con el "mecanicismo" de las técnicas conductista, fui derivando hacia planteamientos humanistas. Descubrí a Rogers y a Carkhuff y me apasioné con sus planteamientos.

Albert Ellis entró en mi vida a través de sus libros y de un curso que impartió en Madrid; me volví un cognitivista converso. La curiosidad por los procesos mentales me llevó a explorar los planteamientos de la Semántica General y, a partir de la teoría de Korzybski, entendí mejor las propuestas constructivistas de Kelly y los fundamentos de la terapia narrativa.

Después, por diversas circunstancias, llegó mi época de Palo Alto; allí conocí a Watzlawick, Richard Fish, y los fundamentos de su lema: "let´s be brief".

Finalmente, me declaré "ecléctico integracionista".

Pero algo, dentro de mí, me impulsaba a replantearme una y otra vez los fundamentos de mi trabajo psicoterapéutico: algo no encajaba. Tenía la impresión de que la Psicología había derivado peligrosamente hacia un "medicalismo" que me costaba aceptar.

Finalmente, a través de un libro de divulgación bien sencillo ("la mente o la vida" de J. Barraca, DDB Bilbao) me asomé a la teoría de la terapia de aceptación y compromiso y, entonces, comprendí que ese era el camino que yo andaba buscando. Devoré toda la bibliografía de Carmen Luciano Soriano y, a continuación, con mi poco inglés, fui desmenuzando los planteamientos de Hayes.

Ahora, ya no me preocupa averiguar en qué nicho psicológico debo incluirme: soy un humanista-conductual, interesado en la el examen del guión vital que cada cual aplica a su vida, implicado en la clarificación de los valores que deben sustentar ese guión y comprometido en examinar su propio guión y en acompañar en su camino a quienes a mí acuden...

iniciando el blog

3 Marzo 2006.

Albert is eleven and he loves soccer but he is afraid of going alone to school due to a bully agression some weeks ago.
We talk about his fears. He is very clever. He doesn´t need many explanations to understand the consequences of stay home in order to avoid his fear. He understand the difference between short and long term consequences.
At the end of our first meeting he has tears in his eyes but he is committed to go alone to school.
I wait for his first phone call: It´s Ok, he has gone to school alone an he feels free.
In his second call hi goes further: he has met some bullies in his way... but he loves soccer; so he decided to go to school anyway.

Alberto, 11 años; todo ojos y todo angustia. Le gusta el fútbol y está bien integrado en su colegio. Hace algún tiempo, unos gitanos le pegaron. Desde entonces, Alberto tiene miedo de ir él solo al colegio y se hace acompañar por su madre.

Hablamos de "hombre a hombre". Alberto es muy despierto y capta enseguida el mensaje. No necesito insitir mucho en el ejemplo del odontólogo para que capta la distinción entre "efectos a corto y a largo plazo". Pronto admite que su estrategia de quedarse en casa y salir sólo acompañado por su madre, no va a resolver nada en absoluto y, con ojos llenos de lágrimas, decide que tendrá que hacer en solitario el camino del colegio.

Anticipamos futuras consecuencias posibles del asumir el riesgo de ir solo al colegio: podrá quedarse a entrenar a fútbol con sus compañeros, se sentirá más libre, "crecerá"...

Nos despedimos con un apretón de manos... tal vez yo con más angustia que él. Espero ansioso su llamada telefónica para la siguiente semana.

En la primera llamada me comunica que ha ido solo al colegio y se ha sentido liberado.

En la segunda llamada me confirma que está yendo al colegio sin necesidad de compañía; ya se ha cruzado con algún gitano... le encanta quedarse con sus compañeros, después de las clases, para entrenar a fútbol.

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